


His Confessions

by NeonDomino



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Coming Out, Found Family, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-23
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-03-13 02:02:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29644107
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeonDomino/pseuds/NeonDomino
Summary: Sirius confesses something to Dorea before telling Remus how he feels.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 2
Kudos: 39





	His Confessions

* * *

“Sirius, sweetheart, what’s wrong?” Dorea asks, as James hovers in the doorway, concerned. “This isn’t like you. Well, perhaps a little, but I know that when you act like this, something is wrong.”

“Yeah, usually you tell me what’s wrong by now,” James says.

Dorea gives James a look. “James, I told you to let me deal with this,” she says, before looking back at the teenager with face buried in a cushion. “And close the door behind you.”

James gives one more concerned look. “I just want to help. Plus… Remus will be here tomorrow, and the full-moon and all… I don’t want him to be worrying over Sirius too.”

At the mention of Remus, Sirius shifts a little and Dorea hears a small whimper.

“James,” Dorea murmurs, and James listens, closing the door as he leaves. She turns her attention back to Sirius. “It’s just me and you my dear,” she murmurs gently. “Remember last time, I sat here all night when you were upset over your parents. The time before, and every time you’ve been sad. I’m here, and whatever is wrong, I’ll do what I can to help you.”

There’s a long silence, but Dorea is patient. She knows sometimes Sirius needs to think. The poor boy overthinks everything because he’s had to at home. One day he will realise he doesn’t have to here. But that’s his way, so she glances around the room and tries to find something to break the tension. Sirius won’t talk first.

“I was thinking of painting this room a nice brown. It’ll be really warm,” she murmurs. “You can still put some posters up on the wall.” Her gaze moves to a picture on the bedside table. “Ah, a new photo. If you want that up, I’ll find a frame—”

“No, I’ll pick one,” Sirius says, lifting his head and looking at her. His eyes are red from crying and now Dorea can work out the level of upset. Sirius fights with himself so he doesn’t cry. This isn’t him sulking, or someone or something bothering him. 

Dorea looks back towards the picture. It’s important enough for Sirius to want to pick out a frame, and she realises it’s just a picture of Sirius and Remus together.

Two mentions of Remus and two reactions from Sirius.

“Are you worried about Remus?” she asks quietly.

There’s a flicker of something in Sirius’ face, and he shrugs his shoulders.

“Mum,” he murmurs, though he looks at her to make sure she’s still okay with the name. She gives him a reassuring smile and reaches to take his hand. He doesn’t flinch away, which is a big step in her opinion. Sirius used to flinch when someone reached to hug him.

“I kissed a girl at school and I didn’t like it.”

“Okay, perhaps you weren’t interested in her romantically?”

Sirius slowly shakes his head. “Mum, Remus… Remus… he has… he’s got nice eyes, right?”

Dorea isn’t sure where this change of conversation has come from, but she tries to roll with it. 

“I mean…” there’s fear on his face as he looks at her, “what would happen if I kissed him instead?”

Dorea stares at him for a long moment as she tries to process this. Sirius who came home last term bragging about all the girls that fancy him. Sirius who claimed he could date any girl in school that he wanted. 

“How long have you felt like this?”

“A couple… a few years. But I thought it was… I mean, girls compliment each other all the time, so they must find each other pretty, right? So I just assumed…”

“You find… you find Remus… pretty?”

Sirius’ face drops and she can see the scared boy who turned up on her doorstep with a suitcase, bruises, and tears running down his cheeks all over again. She realises that this conversation is scary for him - because he’s having to face what his attraction to his friend really means, and whilst she’s shocked, she doesn’t want him to think she’s not going to support him.

She squeezes his hand. “Darling, you need to be careful about this.”

“Why? Should I keep it a secret? Will James hate me? Will Remus?” Wide grey eyes watch her.

She shakes her head. “James will be accepting,” she promises. “And Remus… he’s the accepting sort too. I meant that you need to be careful in case Remus doesn’t feel the same. He may not be attracted to other males, Sirius. So just carefully broach the subject and if he doesn’t feel the same, don’t push it. You could hurt your friendship.”

Sirius slowly nods. “You’re not mad at me?”

“Why would I be?”

“Because… because I think… more than think… I’m pretty sure, quite certain that I’m… I’m gay. I’m… I’m sorry.” Tears that he can’t hold back trail down his cheeks, as much as he tries to fight it.

“Why would that change how I feel about you, sweetheart? You’re a son to us, Sirius, and we accept you. There’s certainly nothing to apologise for, okay? You don’t have to rush to tell everyone, just take your time?”

Sirius nods. A small smile appears on his lips. “I thought that there was something wrong with me. Why are you so nice?”

“Because I’m a mum,” she tells him. “Your mum.”

His smile widens at that, and he shifts across the bed, leaning in and wrapping his arms around her. She hugs him tightly.

"How do I do this?" he whispers. "How can I tell my best friend that I'm in love with him?"

* * *

“So,” Sirius starts, clearing his throat. “I… I want to tell you guys something. And I hope you’ll… be cool about it.”

He glances at Dorea and she smiles encouragingly.

“Is it why you’ve been sulking?” James asks, and Dorea shakes her head at her son, and he quickly shuts up.

“Well, the thing is… I kissed Marlene.”

Remus’ smile falls and Dorea turns her full attention to him instead. Remus looks so hurt at this information, and he’s looking at Sirius as though Sirius has just broken his heart.

“And I hated it. I’m… I’m gay, I’m in love with Remus.” He glances at Remus. “It’s totally cool if you don’t want to be my boyfriend. I mean… I’d rather you want to be, but if you don’t, then we can still be friends.”

James stands. “It’s cool with me. I’ll just give you and Remus some time to talk, I’ll go and make tea, shall I?”

Sirius turns his attention back to Remus, and Dorea can see the worry on Sirius' face. But she can see the way Remus is looking back at Sirius, like this moment is a dream come true. “I’ll start on dinner. Charlus, would you like to come and help?”

Charlus nods, and as they all leave the room, she takes one last look back. Sirius tucking a strand of hair behind Remus’ ear, and she’s glad that they’re leaving the room, because their presence may have ruined the moment a little bit, and she follows James into the kitchen.

“You didn’t sound surprised,” Charlus says to his son.

James smiles and shrugs. “I’m not,” he admits, flicking the switch for the kettle. “I’ve suspected for a while. I didn’t realise he was upset over this though, and was a bit confused when I saw him kiss Marlene on the train. It’s just how he is with Remus, how he looks at Remus. How he…” he trails off as Sirius walks in, a wide smile on his face and his fingers on his lips.

“James, you’ll be sharing with Remus instead of Sirius,” Charlus says. “Sirius, me and you are going to have a different bird and the bees chat… once I’ve read a book or two.” He gives Sirius a warm smile, and Sirius smiles around at everyone.

“Did that kiss feel any better?” Dorea checks.

Sirius nods. “Yeah. That… perfect. We’re going on our first date tomorrow, and not to worry, Pops. I’ll marry him soon enough so we can share a room.”

“Marry? Well, perhaps that’s two talks we’ll have.”

“I just came in to ask James if he can make Remus a hot-chocolate. You know how much he likes one after the full moon. Of course he’d never ask for himself, but I’m his boyfriend now and gotta do these things.” He sighs.

“Shut up, you love it,” James says, grinning at him as he reaches up into the cupboard where the Potters store Remus’ chocolate.

“I really do,” Sirius insists. “Best day of my life.”

* * *


End file.
